Well it is 7 days to the election, and I hope everyone out there who is registered to vote goes and votes. I am fairly amazed that this election is so close, compared with where things were a year ago. That in a way is enough for me.
9/11 was a difficult thing to deal with- I had to cope this profound idea that everything had changed and nothing would be the same ever again. I was incredibly frustrated and depressed, as I had no control over this thing that affected my life so greatly. Finally, along around this time 3 years ago I had a break through- I realized that the only thing that had changed was TV.
This sounds both cold and naive, but at the end of the day just a couple of buildings had fallen, and there were some tragic deaths. Unfortunate yes, but physically it had no more effect on this country then the San Francisco earthquake of 1989. America was no more or less powerful then before. What had changed? Extremists overseas hated Americans? That was nothing new. The economy was tanking? The bubble has burst months before the buildings collapsed. The post 9/11 world was exactly the same as the pre-9/11 world, except for the fact that TV, (and newspapers, and radio…) were all acting like it was different. That realization allowed me to be able to cope- to see all this hoopla for what it was- theater. So I bought myself an Xbox, and ignored it this new TV, like it was a bad reality show.
About a year after that, during the run up to the war, I had to cope with a different form of depression. This was related to the fact that the media, and every talking head was accepting the huge lies being used by the administration. All the facts were there in the public space for someone who wanted to look, but it was like everyone was choosing to be blind to it- they just wanted to jump behind the administration, like it was ID4, and the evil aliens were attacking. For the first time I knew how it felt to be going crazy.
When you know something to be true, Know it to be true, and everyone around you holds a contradictory point of view, its very stressful, since your mind wants to reconcile the disconnect. (There are 4 lights!) There are forms of neurosis that develop when someone can't disprove either of the contradictory 'facts' staring them in the face. With the media and everyone ignoring the facts about the WMDs and the reasons for going to war, it was very difficult to watch. The nagging feeling that I was wrong, and the Neo-cons were right really ate away at my core, and made me very disengaged. It really not until I went to the March 15th antiwar rallies, and saw that I was not isolated in my disgust with this fake reality being pumped out, that I began to be able to deal with what was happening.
The fact that over 1000 soldiers have died in Iraq, and it has gone disastrously wrong is an amazingly tragic. But it gave me perspective enough to see that the thing I believe are not just my opinions, but are facts. The fact that the administration, despite their complete control of all branches of the government, still could not pull off this war shows that their viewpoint if fundamentally wrong. Even the most powerful man in the world cannot order the sky to stop being blue. This realization has given me confidence in my convictions- something I never had before.
I don’t know what will happen next week. If Bush wins, he will pack the supreme courts with radical rightwing justices, and we will be dealing with them for decades. He will bankrupt Social security, as part of the whole ‘Starve the beast’ initiative. He will fan the flames of xenophobia, to keep Americans fearful, and isolated, and funding an even larger military. As a lame duck president he will be free to pursue his radical Christian agenda as he sees fit.
If Kerry wins, then he will not have an easy time of it. He will have a big mess to try and clean up, and a terrible situation in Iraq to sort out. He will more then likely face a hostile congress, and (unless it is a landslide) his presidency will be surrounded by rumors of voter fraud by the republican noise machine. He will face a conservative controlled media that has been muzzled for 4 years, suddenly let off the leash. A movement to have him impeached will be started before the last ballot is counted, impeachment for any reason that can be found. And since his administration will be coming in with inexperianced new people- there will be mistakes, and leaks and errors of judgment that will be seized upon instantly. It is going to get ugly, and ugly fast.
But I am hopeful either way. I have survived the doubts and uncertainties installed in me by these bums, and I know that I am not alone in my values. With all of their advantages and power to control the message, they are barely neck and neck with their challenger. In the end it is all smoke and mirrors, and I am greatly heartened that at least half of Americans see that. This actually gives me hope for this country, no matter what happens after next week.